I like that sentence a lot..:)

Though is kinda hard to explain why...

Sometimes life just passes us by and we're living it so carefree-ly. And there comes a time in your life when everything in life eg. friends, fun, material things all seem so important that nothing else matters.

That causes us to forget about God.

To the extent that we think that God is not that important and that He won't do things for you and the things people have done to wrong you makes you feel that He won't do anything fast enough and you take matters into your own hands.

Ending up in a even worse condition than before.

Losing friends. Getting backstabbed. Accused of things which you did not do. People calling you nasty names. it is common no doubt, to have to go through all these things...how you handle them, however, is another matter.

You could either turn back to Jesus, and find healing and peace.

OR

You could stay the way you are, bitter and full of anger.

The latter was what I used to be. And its something I'm still doing my best to overcome.

When you really seek peace and healing from Jesus, you'll find it. It doesn't happen overnight however and some days will really get you down, but not out, if you hold out through the end.

I am holding on. As hard as I possibly can. The fear of letting go again sometimes bothers me. Its not the first time I've let go. I hope it will be my last.

I do wish I could see Him just once though...with my own eyes.

I wonder sometimes if my actions justify my faith. And also all the thoughts that go through my mind.

I wonder if my faith is really strong enough. When i think it is, it almost always fails me...and i lose it.

There's a verse though, which I'm doing my best to apply it to myself...

its in Proverbs.

Avoid all perverse speech, keep away from corrupted talk.

Don't really know which chapter nor which verse its in ....*embarassed*

I've got many giants to face. i just hope that i face them with God by my side instead of rushing headlong into them without Him.

Meditation...I need more time to meditate and not be disturbed by mad people on MSN who can't keep from perverse talk. You know who you are. I hope you know what you're doing is a sin.

Cheers,

Caroline